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 That a short and poor article.

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20Ryan4united

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帖子主题: That a short and poor article.   周一 十月 17, 2011 11:39 am

It was written by me during the class this morning.




[b]I was walking alone such a cold winter evening. Sunddenly,here came a begger.He trembled before me with thin clothes.I stood before him and wondered what happened to him.But Iwas in daze. He looked so poor that there was not any brilliant things in his life.I gave him a pen and a piece of paper that I wanted to know something about him.But it was too cold to write.He waved his hands to refuse me. He was thinking about something.We stared at each other without any words.At that time,light snow stopped and here came heavy rain again.[b]
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Nate
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帖子主题: 回复: That a short and poor article.   周二 十月 18, 2011 2:48 pm

Ryan, what did you write this for? Are you looking for corrections or suggestions from other people?
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20Ryan4united

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帖子主题: 回复: That a short and poor article.   周三 十月 19, 2011 9:32 pm

Nate 写道::
Ryan, what did you write this for? Are you looking for corrections or suggestions from other people?
My teacher required us to write a story.I would have written a complete story but the time was over that I cannot finish it.I leave this article merely. pig
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Nate
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帖子主题: 回复: That a short and poor article.   周三 十月 19, 2011 9:34 pm

You did a very good job with it! There are some errors, but I do like the descriptive parts in it. Good work. Writing is a great way to practice!
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20Ryan4united

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帖子主题: 回复: That a short and poor article.    周四 十月 20, 2011 12:09 am

Nate 写道::
You did a very good job with it! There are some errors, but I do like the descriptive parts in it. Good work. Writing is a great way to practice!
Rolling Eyes Thank you! I'm sure I will do it often. And I want you to tell me what are the errors of this article and how to express them correctly. Question study
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帖子主题: 回复: That a short and poor article.   周日 十月 23, 2011 8:26 pm

Your errors are in bold, Ryan:

I was walking alone such a cold winter evening. Sunddenly,here came a begger.He trembled before me with thin clothes.I stood before him and wondered what happened to him.But Iwas in daze. He looked so poor that there was not any brilliant things in his life.I gave him a pen and a piece of paper that I wanted to know something about him.But it was too cold to write.He waved his hands to refuse me. He was thinking about something.We stared at each other without any words.At that time,light snow stopped and here came heavy rain again.
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That a short and poor article.
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